"A Word That Should Be Used Carefully"

 

“A Word That Should Be Used Carefully”

 

During my pastoral days our church’s youth once rendered an innovative musical and dramatic presentation in a Resurrection Sunday service which was done very well. The next day a member of the congregation came to my office to make known her displeasure with the effort the teens had made. As she gave her reasons for why she thought it was inappropriate she used the word “should” several times. I stopped her and cautioned her about utilizing this term carelessly as it suggested her opinion was the standard the church was obligated to follow. To her credit she listened and saw my point even though she didn’t agree totally. She then suggested that an explanation be given if something “out of the ordinary” was to be done so people would be prepared. I affirmed her proposal and we implemented it several times in the years following. This incident illustrates how a disagreement can have positive results if all concerned show a teachable spirit.

Recently another event brought this one back to my mind and I began to think of how often I use “should” without thinking. So I did an on-line search and according to Oxford Languages “it is used to indicate obligation, duty or correctness, typically when criticizing someone’s actions.” (Emphasis added). God then reminded me that I was, in effect, holding others to my personal standard if I spoke or thought in this way (this is otherwise known as judgment or legalism). So I asked God to forgive me and keep me from falling into this trap in the future.

I’ve come to the conclusion that the only context in which the word is always fitting is Scripture. “Should” appears about 675 times in the KJV and 371 times in the NIV. In the NIV concordance (my source for this number) it almost always has the notation AIT (Assists In Translation—in English class it was called a helping verb). Here are a few examples of how it’s used:

*Keeping the church functioning smoothly (“…Everything should be done in a fitting and orderly way.”—1 Corinthians 14:40).

*Building others up (“Each of us should please {our} neighbor for {his or her} good, to build {him or her} up.”—Romans 15:2).

*Doing good works (“For we are {God’s} workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.”—Ephesians 2:10, KJV).

*Utilizing our gifts (“Each one should use whatever gift {he or she} has received to serve others….”—1 Peter 4:10).

*Examining ourselves (“Each one should test {his or her} own actions.”—Galatians 6:4).

Howard Hendricks said, “The two words we should always be careful never to use are always and never.” Let’s add “should” to this list of words to be used carefully for the benefit of all.

 

Grace and Blessings!

Jim McMillan